As if women didn’t have enough to deal with. We have to figure out what’s going on with our bodies and all of its changes during puberty, only to discover it will change once again during pregnancy. Then, just when you think you’ve got it under control, it changes yet again after the baby–or babies–are born. And let’s not get into menopause. Most of the female population are very critical of themselves and their bodies. We are never happy with how we look. Instead, we go ahead and change it. We get bigger, perkier breasts. We flatten our stomach. We suck some fat from our thighs. Our face, eyes, lips, neck, ears–nothing is sacred. Even our booty gets injected and plumped and shaped. What could possibly be next?Some women are even critical of how their vagina looks so they are lining up to get a procedure called labiaplasty, which is is plastic surgery of either the labia majora or the labia minora or both — the external folds of skin (aptly called beef curtains) surrounding the structures of the vagina.

Vaginal rejuvenation is also on the rise. Obviously, turning back the clock on your vagina is something of great importance. Apparently, this has been going on for some time now. I’m not bringing you some hot off the presses information because apparently I’ve been so deep in my large family, homeschooling world that I had no idea this sort of craziness was happening to women. Whether this is the first time you’ve heard of it, or it’s old news, I still feel this is relevant to speak about. What makes a woman mutilate herself in such a way? It makes me sad. Sad to think to think that my daughters might one day find their private parts ugly and disgusting. So much so that they are willing to cut it off like some excess fat from a piece of steak. If you have some time, check out this video. And it is NSFW. It’s also NSFYV: not safe for your vagina. There is a pretty graphic scene (around 10:40) of an actual labiaplasty that will make you break out in a cold sweat and watch it with your thighs pressed tightly together.

I am quite content with my lady parts, thank you very much. After six kids, it’s practically a rock star. Have you seen this video? What do you think of this procedure?Sea urchins sometimes nest under foreskin not smeg dumbass, it's pearly penile papules Penis docking requires a foreskin Covering the glans, the foreskin be an addendum to the white male penis and God's way of sorting out the Semites from the gentiles. Fanfictions need to keep it real. Foreskins are known to be ugly as hell on all men (see picture at right). Most women are rather disappointed if their man gets naked for them the first time and they discover that he's sporting a horrific dog-dick. It's like when you look see a woman's pussy for the first time in your life and realize real pussy is absolutely revolting. So we men must have our genitals mutilated to appeal to women while women can get away with having flappy, smegma infested, UTI brewing, beef curtains. Take a look in your trousers;

you either have a foreskin or you're a Jew. It's as simple as that. Its also interesting to note that your little ant eater down there has been known to house:hessian blackout curtains The following tricks are most win if performed during oral sex directly in the person's face, or at an urinal, at which point you turn, and release. thermal tuscan blackout curtainsThis can bring major lulz. curtains tuam(If you think inflating your dick sounds retarded, you just need to huff some more helium, and that feeling will pass.)curtains leixlip The most well known of all foreskin tricks, The Frog is achieved by clamping the foreskin closed over the glans with the index finger and thumb and then proceeding to urinate. red striped curtains 90x90

Upon urination the penis will swell up in a manner not unlike the throat of certain frog species during a mating ritual. The results of The Frog can be widely variant, but the performance typically elicits a simultaneous response of homoerotic-love and homoerotic-awe from the hipsterdouche onlookers.blackout curtains penneys Like The Frog, Egg Drop (or ED) ’tweaks’ start in the same manner, i.e. with the foreskin being ‘digitally clamped’ to reservoir the lulz juice of choice to fashion a delivery system for unloading the lulz 'punchline' (or "Money Shot").blackout curtains eclipse target However, unlike The Frog, The ED requires Hubble-like focus and lightning quick reflexes for as the fap reaches critical mass the often unpredictable Sexytime Explosion needs to be ‘nipped in the bud’ as it were, with the speedy application of the aforementioned ‘digital clamp’ before your critical mass becomes a critical mess.

At this point, with Phase 1. COLLECTION accomplished, The Frog and The Egg Drop(s) part ways (and means); the ideal The Egg Drop needing the kind of precision guidance that makes The Frog look like an unpredictable Hezbollah Katyusha rocket.(after the obligatory Stage 2 of: ?) of The EDs are all about the transportation and delivery of the prenatal lulz juice to their respective targets, The Egg Drop in particular requiring a steady hand, Olympic timing, pinpoint accuracy and the patience of a sniper. The ideal Egg Drop is performed from an open second story window onto an unsuspecting friend, ex-girlfriend, cop or baby in a crib. It may take a while, so bring something to read - but absolutely no pr0n. Bonus points and EPIC WIN are achieved if you hit anyone (primary target or no) in the lunch.lesser EDs can be performed in and around the house (including the Egg Drop Soup) government buildings, libraries, theaters, public transport etc. etc. For example, there’s no better way of saying “Kthxbye” to the stranger you came home from the pub with last night than an Egg Drop facial wake-up call.

This kind of Egg Drop is basically the Egg Drop Soup variant, without the ‘soup’; it’s moar personal and garners immediate reaction whereas with the original Egg Drop the fallout often has to be imagined, as a speedy withdrawal from your ‘snipers’ nest’ may be the best course of action...especially if your target has been a police officer eating a sandwich. As for the Egg Drop Soup, well, it’s easy and a good place to start if you’re to become an A+++ IRL Egg Drop troll. Essentially the same as the Egg Drop, it’s primary target is the toilet bowl, ideally one that’s recently been urinated in and left unflushed. The freshly ‘dropped’ load of lulz juice floating in the yellowed waters gives it the appearance of a big bowl of the eponymous Chinese soup and hence the name. This technique is especially good for the youngsters (to piss off mom), college students (to piss off roomies), and over-it-all pussy whipped boyfriends who’ve had enough of all the fucking potpourri and shit the bitch put all over the house when she moved in.

This requires one other person, unless you're superman and can reach your own flaccid penis with your mouth (PROTIP: the extra bit of skin makes this task slightly moar possible). Basically you get your partner of choice to blow up your foreskin like a balloon while your penis is flaccid, a hilarious party trick, especially when you pinch it closed while inflated and draw faces on your head. If you're super special and creative, you can even try inflating your foreskin with helium and tying shut the end, just to see if your penis will float forever vertically. Also you can pinch the end shut, not tightly, and squeeze the "balloon" to make a farting sound. For men who want to queef. As the Victorians understood, the presence of the foreskin allows for extra friction in fapping. By sticking your dick between your legs and rubbing them together, you severely lower the risk of Carpal Tunnel Syndrome as well as avoid the painful tugging motion which flayed penises must endure.